Omens from the keyboard of a good day in progress:

• "Are they fascist zombie house-elves?"
  
• Creating a style in Word called "I'll bullet you in a minute"
  
• Then creating a follow-up one called "I'll bullet your mother"
  
• Realising that said styles are even in correct alphabetical order
  
• "Is there a more formal naming structure I should be using for these files? (Well, of course there is, because the only way I could get less formal would be to call them Fred and Barbara. Barb to her friends.)"
  
• "Imagining handcuffs is a noble pursuit."