I just had a conversation with my mother about religion. I get an inkling that maybe she finally understands how I feel about the whole thing. That's something at least.

She prays for me, for my conversion. That makes me feel... degraded. Like my opinion, my desires are nothing. Like it doesn't matter that I have found my way, my path, something through which I can feel the Divine (something I could never do through church). She says she loves me and will continue to pray that I be saved.

I don't quite say that if I prayed, I would pray for her to have more compassion, a wider mind, and more belief in my abilities to look after my own soul and relationship with the Divine.