Welcome to Insomnia Unlimited, increasing the quantity of your waking hours.

To get to bed at midnight, press 1.
To have a bedmate with a fever, press 2.
To have the most annoying car alarm in the world go off for ten minutes, press 3.
To be awake when the garbage truck starts its twenty-minute churn outside the window, press 4.
To have the building fire evacuation alarm go off before the clock in the morning, press 5.

To combine all these factors into one fuck-off awful night of sleep, please faceplant on the keypad now.