I think what I find so knee-weakeningly appealing about John Cusack is that no matter what, he always looks a little fragile. Playing a minorly tough cop guy, just finished swearing a blue streak at morons, and he still looks delicate. Delectable. Mmmmm.

Ahem.

Yes, I've been watching Con Air again. Silliness on legs - Nick Cage's quite long jean-clad legs, in fact. Not that I have a thing for Mr Cage, in fact, I really don't find him attractive at all, and as A mentioned, if he could get through the movie without actually talking, that would be just fine and dandy with me. However, I can't deny that in that specific scene where he's trying to talk Diamond and Cyrus out of killing the guards, and he kicks them in the backs, his legs look incredibly long, shapely, and overall eminently shapely. Shame they're attached to that completely non-aphrodisiacal upper body.

Where was I? Oh, nowhere near a point anyway. Excellent.

Film Group all-nighter. Charlie's Angels (which I missed, tutors' meeting, but I'm steadily wondering if I really want to see it at all), Shanghai Noon (I want to be Jackie Chan when I grow up), The Art of War, Die Hard, Con Air. Ten hours of sweaty guys (and girls) kicking ass. Cool.

The Art of War was... well, it was an 80s blockbuster with some 90s action. Nice action sequences. Some interesting direction. Overall, fairly mediocre, but quite a large amount of fun. Touch obvious in places, especially once I realised that it was following the rules for a blockbuster exactly. Since I practically have the manual on my shelf, there was little that surprised me after that.

The rules being, to whit: (1) High Stakes - the world has to be in danger, or at least the personal world of the lead character in such a stunning way as to render it all-encompassing - in this case, the looming of possible war between China and the US, another Cold War brewing. (2) Larger-than-life characters - they have to be capable of amazing things - Wesley Snipes as a blacker-than-thou UN secret ops guy, need I say more? (3) The Dramatic Question - what you sit through the book or movie to find out - as is so often the case, will he prove his innocence/get the bad guys/save the world and the girl. (4) High Concept - basically involves an unusual look, something the readers or viewers can really get intrigued in - UN secret ops, Triads, high-powered politics... yeah, I think we can do that. (5) And this one was the real giveaway: Close connections between the lead characters, especially the protagonist and antagonist. The closer they are, you see, the more intense the conflict is. And that's what made some of the 'twists' of the plot terribly predictable.

Sorry. Didn't mean to write an essay there.

Die Hard is the classic, of course. The ultimate classic. It's got all the elements. The irreverant Bruce Willis (always much more fun when he's not taking himself seriously), the delightfully sinister Alan Rickman, the moronic cops you love to see get killed (and honestly, how stupid are you when Bruce Willis' NYPD cop guy is that much smarter than you, I mean really...). Mind you, the best bit is still the coke-snorting in the office. God bless the 80s.

Here endeth the rambling. Go outside and get some sunshine, people. I won't be able to; I have a 500 word review assignment to write by Wednesday. Something tells me I should probably read the article in question in some detail. Maybe.