Bored and in need of seeming witty, I searched through my own archives for "quotes". What I end up with is a real patchwork of my time in college.

The narky: "Unfortunately, no, there are no more echidnas. If you like, I can superglue some toothpicks to your head and you can play pretend."
The stupid: "What does your coffee-maker do?"
The poetic: "The wedgie is in the arse of the beholder."
The disaffected: "If it hasn't been shown to be fraudulent and corrupt, it is carcinogenic."
The manic: "You blinked! Hah! You did it again! Face it, you're just incompetent."
The technical: "There is 37 minutes flight time on a ballistic missile from the USSR to the USA."

And one found in Jen's archives. I said this one:

"These pants have just been an adventure all day!"