Death comes for us all (a melodramatic haiku of retirement)
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guts and garters

It's all fun and games until someone loses molecular cohesion.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Fuck this game.

I've taken a very stand-offish approach to AFL since my arrival in this crazy state - well, to be accurate, I've taken a stand-off-and-laugh-ish approach. I find the whole game hilarious, and have been satisfied to mock widely without bias or affiliation.

This year, Afny decided I should support the Western Bulldogs. His reasons were numerous and well thought out. I capitulated, and my reason was shallow and called Jordan McMahon, the prettiest man to pull a footy jumper over his luscious, tousled locks this season.

And now, apparently, Jordie's going to Richmond. I can't possibly support Richmond. They're Richmond. Why couldn't he have gone to Port? I'd already promised an amiable and rather tipsy chap on the street that I would support Port for the grand final. Actually, stuff that, why couldn't he have stayed at the Bulldogs? He's so pretty in the white strip.

Whaddya mean, I'm not getting into the spirit of the game?

To be more comprehensive, Afny's reasons didn't really hold up this season either. The exciting, fast midfield and style of play that he'd pimped at me were, indeed, quite enjoyable to watch, but they kept floundering at the fifty and being unable to convert possession to actual marks, let alone goals. They may, at the outset, have looked like a possibility for the flag, but we failed to make the eight. They do still have Akermanis, the most deliciously reviled man in AFL, but I'm really not sure that's enough to make me stick around for another season.

Life was so much easier when I could just mock.

3 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Out of curiosity, what is wrong with Richmond?

1:11 PM  
Blogger Dee said...

Objectively, probably nothing. I'm sure they're very nice boys who try their hardest and love their mothers. And in the echelons of mockery in this house, they at least rank above teams like Hawthorn, and certainly above Carlton and Collingwood. But still...

8:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pffft. GO SAINTS!!! :D

8:41 AM  

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